La vie est belle !

Sonnets in my bonnet…

So, I saw this “Poetry Slam” thing on Yeah Write (a site which I absolutely love but just haven’t found the time to participate in as of late) and it’s been rambling around my head for most of the month. This post by Rowan is so nicely put together and easy to understand, I thought, “hmmm…I’ve been meaning to do some poetry, look at some forms, etc…maybe I should try one of these.”  And then I would let it go for a while. Then I decided to go through some more boxes in my office, and saw that younger me had indeed tried her hand at some sonnets. So I decided to reward younger me for her efforts and publish two of them (with only minor changes…I am her editor, after all!) I will let you decide how well she did. These were school assignments, and the second one even earned her some nice comments from the professor (a real poet…I’ve talked about him before Here.)

Now, according to the official post, the Yeah Writers are only working with the English Sonnet form, and the one I wrote in 1990 was an Italian form. The earlier one, from around 1987 uses the English form. I have no idea how these will stack up in terms of staying true to the form, but I will present them to you anyway, under the more relaxed “Moonshine Grid” because while I think I am being brave to post them, I am not yet brave enough to submit them for hard-core scrutiny. Besides, posting three sonnets in one post would definitely not meet the guidelines for the moderated grid 🙂  Wait…did I say “three”? Ok, yes. So since I am posting the work of young Jetgirl, I figured “40-something” Jetgirl should try her hand at one too. I’m not sure if I’m happy with it, but there is nothing to be lost in trying! So here is the chronological progression; I’ll leave it to you to decide whether it is actually a progression in terms of improvement over the years!

 

A Mindscape — c. 1987

There is a place where only dreamers go,

It makes it’s home within the mind and soul.

There lives the springtime and the winter snow.

It carries love and hatred yet untold.

 

The love it harbors rests within the spring,

Daffodils and iris bright there stay

They symbolize the joy that laughter brings,

Their blooms burst forth with love in full array.

 

The wintertime, an icy frigid lane

Where coldness can hold beauty in its ice

Designs of gross will ornament the panes

With dazzling art — the lace of paradise.

 

It won’t be seen by those who do not know,

There is a place where only dreamers go.

 

 

Lucas — c. 1990

Where have you gone, who wins so many hearts?

You capture both the weak-willed and the strong.

You — siren’s son, you snare me with your song,

I love to dance around you, then we part.

 

You fill my empty life with lively art,

Play your pipes and let me sing along,

I dance with you and love you ’til the dawn,

And then you turn and pierce me with your dart.

 

But wait, don’t run away so fast my love,

There’s something I should tell you ere you go;

I miss you though you do not give, but take,

I searched in you to find a treasure trove —

 

But I found nothing; this you know. You know

Those are my tears that glitter in your wake.

 

 

 

Sonnet – 2015

A poet, whilst she dreams, creates a place

of beauty, making ribbons out of words.

Gleaming threads, alluring sounds release

Melodic patterns yearning to be heard.

 

In singing, chanting, rhythm well employed,

Her phrases weave themselves around the truth.

A picture, lingual colors we enjoy

That offer up an image like a proof.

 

But don’t allow a pretty thing to steal

Discernment from a mind that reason knows

Ephemera with fairy tale appeal

Mere seeds from which imagination grows.

 

A poet’s dreams, reflections of a heart

Not evident, but veiled behind its art.

 

 

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10 Responses to “Sonnets in my bonnet…”

  1. Sammy D.

    K – I’m far from a credible poetry critic, but I’d be hard-pressed to notice the years spanning your three lovely pieces (perhaps because you use an expert editor). I read each of these aloud, enjoying the cadence and your meaning. Well done. I especially like Lucas.

    I’m so glad you posted these. That comment you left me recently: ‘you’re brave’ is rebounding back to you. You cannot know how others will receive your work – and in your own eyes it might not measure up – but if none of us are willing to be ‘artists in progress’, we never post at all and we never encourage others to be brave.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  2. innatejames

    I like “lingual colors”. It popped up the color red for me, as in the color of a tongue. I think your last 2 lines tie your point up well, too.

    Like

    Reply
  3. Le génie

    J’ai essayé avec google translate d’approcher la beauté de ces vers…
    Le premier poème me plait bien.
    dommage que la jeune Jetcos ne connaissais pas encore le français

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

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